After Aiden slides inside the Mercedes, Jonathan offers me another smile.
The welcoming expression instantly drops as soon as he gets into the backseat beside Aiden.
Something clenches in my chest as the car leaves the school grounds.
I have a bad feeling about this.
Super bad.
Aiden
Silence is the only language in the car.
Jonathan is on his phone, probably finishing up business. I’m surprised he even showed up in the human world around this time.
In the afternoons, he’s usually speaking Chinese with other tycoons from the other part of the ocean.
Or Japanese.
I retrieve my phone and find a text.
Elsa:Text me when you’re done?
A smile tugs on my lips. I can almost hear her tentative voice if she were to say that.
I didn’t miss the worried note in her eyes or the fear she tried to hide when I left.
Jonathan scares her and for that alone, I want him the fuck away from her. That’s why I chose to go with him willingly.
I type.
Aiden:I’ll be doing a lot more than texting you back when I’m done.
The reply is immediate.
Elsa:Like what?
Aiden:Like finish what I started. You owe me a fuck, sweetheart. I need to pound in you so deep, you won’t be able to walk tomorrow.
Aiden:Also, I need to come down your throat again just to engrave the image from earlier to memory.
Only it’s already engraved in memory.
The way she looked up at me with her mouth filled with my cum will stay with me until the day I die.
My dick strains against my trousers just thinking about it.
Now that I’ve had that visual, I need to do it over and over again because I don’t get enough.
Not when it comes to her.
Elsa is an addiction that first got under my skin, but is now flowing through my veins and into my bloodstream.
I need to bleed out to get her out.
And even then, I doubt she’d leave.
She sees my texts. The dots appear and disappear as if she’s thinking about what to reply.
Elsa:I’ll let you do that.
I raise an eyebrow.
Aiden:Is that so?
Elsa:After you tell me a story. You’ll owe me two after a fuck and a blowjob *winking emoji*
Hmm. She’s being manipulative more than usual lately.
It makes me so fucking proud.
Aiden:Pass.
Elsa:But I was looking forward to repeating today.
Little fucking tease.
Oh, she’s good. She’s getting so good at playing my game.
Aiden:Kinda want to fuck the shit out of you right now, sweetheart.
Elsa:I’m good with that, too.
Fuck me and this girl who’s toying with my damn mind.
Aiden: You’ll let me do anything?
Elsa:Maybe.
I smile.
“Is that Steel?” Jonathan’s voice wipes the smile off my face.
Fuck.
I forgot that he was just here — and probably watching me the entire time.
I tuck my phone in my pocket and face him with my neutral expression. “Why did you pick me up from school?”
He narrows his eyes because he doesn’t like to be ignored. “We’re here.”
The car comes to a stop and the driver nods at us from the mirror.
I stare through the window and tighten my grip on my phone.
Fucking Jonathan.
Pine trees stand tall in the distance like stones of memories.
Jonathan opens his door. “Come out.”
I close my eyes and take a long breath before I follow him.
He faces a tree with his hands in front of him like he’s a soldier.
The cliff beyond the huge tree appears like a giant mouth, ready to be fed.
The area is desolate with no people or animals in sight. Jonathan made sure to buy it so no trespassers would come near this road.
He even has his top-notch security company guard this place. Two agents dressed like MI6 spies nod at us. They stand in front of their black cars a short distance away — but not within hearing range.
Jonathan doesn’t nod back or acknowledge them.
His entire attention remains on the tree.
This tree stood tall for the past ten years despite the scratches at its trunk.
It’s funny how some things never change.
I stand beside Jonathan and shove both my hands in my trousers.
“Do you know what today is?” he asks without sparing me a glance.
“Alicia’s birthday.”
“Happy birthday.” His tone is emotionless, cold even. “You would’ve been forty today.”
I grind my jaw but say nothing.
“Alicia died here,” he repeats the piece of information as if I don’t know it.
His voice is still detached, but his eyes say something entirely different.
There’s a softening in there.
Something I never see him offer anyone. Not even Lev and I whom he considers his legacy.
I face the tree again, not wanting to see that expression.
Jonathan is probably playing one of his tricks and I won’t fall for it.
“She died trying to find you,” he continues, plunging the knife deeper. “She died without seeing your face. Four hours, Aiden. She remained in pain for four fucking hours.”
“Are you getting to a point any time soon?”
He rips his gaze from the tree as if it pains him. “Have some fucking respect to your mother and quit playing house with Steel.”
“I’m not playing house. I’m —”
“Enough.” His voice is cold and unnegotiable. “End it. I want it to be humiliating and painful so she’ll come into her power as a shell.”
My left eye twitches, but I ask in a calm tone. “What if she never becomes a shell?”
He’s a fool if he thinks he’ll be able to break Elsa.
She’s the strongest person I know.
But just because he can’t break her, doesn’t mean he can’t hurt her.
“Let me worry about that. You only need to do your part of the deal, Aiden.”
Silence falls down between us as we stare at each other with identical eyes. “Or what?”
He approaches me so he’s looking down on me. “When I say end it. You fucking end it, do you hear me?”
I meet his harshness with mine. “Or what, Jonathan?”
“Or I’ll end it myself.” He throws one last glance at the tree as if he can see Alicia’s ghost and heads to the car. “You have until tomorrow.”
Fuck him and his tactics.
As long as I’m around, no one will hurt Elsa.
Jonathan included.
As soon as the car door slams shut, I briefly close my eyes and face the tree.
“Maybe you’re right, Alicia. Maybe I shouldn’t have been born, huh?”
Elsa
Aiden doesn’t text me back.
I stay up all night, trying to do homework, but all I do is watch my phone like a maniac.
Chaotic thoughts barge into my mind all at once, and none of them are good.
I hated that he went with his father. However, when he texted me in his usual crude way as soon as he got into the car, I thought things were okay.
Maybe they’re not.
Earlier, Uncle came to check on me before he went to bed. I didn’t miss how he barely made eye contact. His dark circles were more prominent like he hasn’t slept in days.
The possibility of being the reason behind that crushes me.
I haven’t seen Aunt since overhearing that conversation, and it’s for the best.
I still don’t know how to act around them just yet.
With a groan, I push off the desk and throw my body on the bed. It’s useless to study when I’ve been reading the same paragraph for hours.
I pull up Aiden’s number.
Elsa: Are you okay?
I bite my lip, waiting for him to see it.
Nothing.
Damn it.
I throw the phone under the pillow and close my eyes.
Everything will be fine in the morning.
A small hand surrounds my smaller one.
The one who shall not be named?
I glimpse up at him, his pretty trousers and shoes. His tousled black hair that falls on his forehead like silk.
He smiles down at me with a twinkle in his dark eyes.
His smile is like the sun.
Rare, but blinding.
I love his smile. It makes me feel safe.
Why am I not as pretty as he is?
I’m the girl, right? I should be prettier than the one who shall not be named.
“Can I say your name now?”
He places a forefinger in front of his mouth. “Shh.”
“Shh,” I repeat, tears filling my eyes. “Ma doesn’t like it.”
He grips my hand harder and leads me to the back garden. Bushes grow on either side of us like walls.
Dad doesn’t like it when I come here.
“Them monsters are here,” I tell the one who shall not be named.
“Shh,” he motions at the house.
Ma stands near the window, doing her red lipstick.
“Dad doesn’t like it,” I say, shrinking behind him.
The one who shall not be named fastens his pace. I jog along, watching his hand around mine.
It’s familiar.
It’s safe.
It’s… happy.
“I miss you.” My voice trembles. “It’s lonely without you. Ma goes to them monsters sometimes.”
“Shh.” He points ahead.
He’s tall so I lean aside to see past him.
I come to a screeching halt, feet gluing to the grass.
The lake.
The murky, black lake.
“No, no…”
“Shh!”
“No! I won’t go in there. I don’t want to go there!” I shriek, my voice crackling with sobs.
My heartbeat skyrockets and everything in my chest aches. I try to pull away from the one who shall not be named, but his grip tightens.
It’s like he can’t let me go even if he wanted to.
No, please.
The murky lake appears almost black under the gloomy weather.
That lake took everything from me.
Everything.
“Eli, please. It’s scary.”
He stops and his face turns into a blur. “You shouldn’t have said my name.”
His hand slips from mine.
My fingers fist around the air as I try to grab him.
No.
No.
His back is the only thing I see as he walks with purpose towards the lake.
“E-Eli?”
He doesn’t turn around.
Black smoke swallows him until I can barely see him.
I run after him with shaky little feet. I trip and nearly fall.
“Eli, C-Come back… Don’t go, please… I’m s-so sorry… d-don’t… go.”
Something warm touches my toes.
I stop at the shore of the lake.
Black water covers my feet and my limbs start shaking.
Eli walks deep into the lake. Only his head is visible.
“Eli!” I call.
I want to go save him. I want to bring him back, but if I do, them monsters in the water will take me.
Them monsters are taking Eli.
“Eli, c-come back! Come back!”
His head disappears underwater and doesn’t surface.
“ELI!!!”
I wake up with a start,tears streaming down my cheeks.
Eli.
Eli…
No. No. No.
That’s not true.
Eli didn’t go.
He couldn’t have been gone.
A taste of nausea hits the back of my throat and I run to the bathroom. I fall to my knees against the hard tiles and empty my stomach in the toilet.
I remain there even after I’m finished, catching my breath.
Tears fall down my cheeks and to my hands.
“Eli…” I sob. “Eli is the one who shall not be named.”
Why can’t he be named and why isn’t he in my life anymore?
I clutch my head between my hands and hit it with a fist over and over again.
Why can’t I remember? Why the hell can’t I remember?
My heart nearly bursts open with a crushing wave of grief.
It’s like having my chest ripped open and slashed apart and all I can do is watch.
Just like I watched when Eli went into that lake and I couldn’t follow.
Eli.
Who the hell is Eli and why do I suddenly feel like I’m missing a big chunk of myself?
“Eli…” His name comes in a strangled sob.
The itch beneath my skin digs into my arms and hands like needles. I stagger to my feet and wash my hands over and over again.
I’m not done with it even when my skin becomes red and stingy. I want to use bleach on my hands.
But even that won’t make them clean, will it?
I stare at my dishevelled picture in the mirror. My hair points in all directions and my eyes are bloodshot. The tears leave streaks over my pale cheeks.
This isn’t just any ache.
It’s chronic pain.
Eli was someone important from my past that I erased just like I erased Ma and Dad.
Just like I erased everything.
“What’s wrong with you?” I whisper to my reflection. “Why can’t you be normal?”
You know what?
Enough.
I’ve had enough of putting everyone else’s wellbeing before my own. I’ll confront Uncle and demand he tells me everything he knows.
I’ll demand he takes me back to Birmingham.
For ten years, I thought I could survive without knowing my past.
But there’s no future without roots. I’ll always be stuck in this whirlwind of emotions and frightening nightmares.
And grief.
Crushing grief.
I can barely breathe as I think about Eli. Uncle needs to tell me who the hell Eli is.
After washing my face and freshening up, I put on my uniform. On my way out of my room, I check my phone, but there’s still no text from Aiden.
My heart smashes further into its cavity, but I swallow the pain down. I exit my room with determination bubbling in my veins.
Today, I’ll face my fears.
Today, I’ll know everything Aunt and Uncle have been hiding for years.
It’s no longer an option. It’s a need now.
I take the steps down, breathing deep and summoning all the courage I have in my bones.
This is the first time I’ll demand to know something about my past.
I’m counting on Uncle’s understanding. Here’s to hoping he didn’t change his mind.
“She’s right upstairs,” Aunt says with a strained tone. “Let’s talk someplace else.”
I stop at the base of the stairs at the corner of the lounge area from where her voice comes through.
So she returned home last night.
“This is as good of a place as any.”
My muscles tighten at that voice.
The voice I never wanted to hear in my house.
Ever.
Could it be that I’m hearing things?
Leaning sideways, I peek slightly inside.
I wrap a hand over my mouth to smother the gasp.
It’s him.
Jonathan King.
Jonathan fucking King is sitting on the chair at the head of the lounge area. He’s wearing a black suit that seems straight out of an Armani fashion show.
Aunt and Uncle sit on the sofa opposite him.
I have a side view, but I can make out the horrified expression on Aunt’s face and the blackening of Uncle’s features.
What the hell is going on?