He grabs my arse cheek, and this time, I whimper, my thighs clamping together. “Or are you perhaps tempting me with this? Do you want me to fuck it?”
“N-no.” My voice is weak, even to my own ears.
I, myself, don’t know what I want him to do. As long as he touches me, has his hands on me, it’s like everything suddenly becomes possible.
“No, huh? I’ll change your mind one day.” He licks the lobe of my ear, murmuring in hot words, “Now, how about I finish the show you started?”
“I didn’t start any show.” I’m surprised I can speak with the stimuli shooting rampant all over my body.
“Oh, but you did. You kept thrusting in and out of your cunt even after you saw me. Were you fantasising about my dick inside you, Butterfly?”
“No!” My voice is defensive, full of shame.
“You know, the more you say that, the surer I am about how much of a liar you are.”
“I’m not lying…ohhh…” My words end in a moan when he releases my arse and plunges two fingers inside me in one go.
The itch from earlier returns with a vengeance and I arch my back, needing more friction. Just more of him.
“Your pussy doesn’t lie, she’s telling me she wants my dick.” He curls his fingers and I moan again, my head collapsing against the tile. “Do you want me inside you, Butterfly?”
“No,” I whisper, my voice desperate.
“Are you sure?”
Of course I do, but I’m not saying it out loud. I’m not going to let him break me into speaking it.
He pushes his hard cock into the crack of my arse and I clench, biting my lower lip.
“It seemed like you wanted it earlier when you were watching my dick and fucking yourself.”
I shut my eyes, unable to take the assault of his words and his touch at the same time. I’m so close to combusting, to begging, but I’ll never do that.
Cole isn’t someone I should let do this to me.
I only want him because I can’t have him, because if anyone found out about what we’re doing behind closed doors, they would shun us.
And that’s sick. Just utterly sick.
If my only form of defence is defying him, then so be it. That’s what he’ll get.
“Open your eyes.”
I don’t.
He grabs a fistful of my hair and spins me around. His fingers slip out of me and I mourn the loss, my walls contracting as if trying to keep him inside.
My back flattens against the cold tiles, causing me to gasp, but I don’t open my eyes.
“Look at me.”
“No.”
He tugs on my hair. “Are you or are you not going to look at me?”
“No.”
“I’m going to fuck that word out of you, Silver.”
My insides liquefy at that promise, but I hang on to my façade with blood-coated fingers. “Just get it over with and leave me alone.”
“You don’t get to treat it as a burden when you’ve been fucking fantasising about it. You don’t get to tell yourself lies just so you can sleep at night.”
Watch me.
He wraps a hand around my throat and squeezes. Hard.
My eyes pop open as I struggle for breath. He eases his hold, allowing me tiny gulps of air.
“There you are.” He stares down at me with those eyes that I sometimes think have no soul behind them.
They’re green, but they feel black.
They’re looking at me, but sometimes, it’s like they’re seeing through me.
He’s gripping me by the hair and the throat, and for some foreign reason, it feels like the most right position to be in.
“I’m going to fuck you and you’re going to scream.” He licks my trembling lower lip. “If you don’t, we can do this all night.”
I don’t speak. I can’t.
It’s like I’ve lost my abilities of speech and thought. I’ve lost everything.
All I can do is watch him. The water forms rivulets down his face giving him an exotic look, the steam of the bathroom swirling around him like a halo.
I’m fucked. So bloody fucked.
He releases my hair and grabs my thigh, lifting it up and, as a result, making my other foot stand on a tiptoe.
“Wrap your legs around my waist,” he orders, but I don’t.
I want him to do it all.
If I don’t participate, I can pretend I didn’t want this. It’s all his doing, not mine.
He must see it in my face because he grabs my other leg and lifts it, slipping inside me, inch by each agonising inch. I close my eyes, but it’s to soak in the sensation.
I tighten my legs around his firm waist to not lose my balance. The force of his thrusts hits my back against the wall over and over again.
I relish in every one of them.
Cole is harsh and out of control, exactly how I imagined he would be when I was fantasising about him earlier.
He squeezes my throat hard enough to make me open my eyes.
“You don’t get to hide, Butterfly.” He peers at me. “Not anymore.”
Yesterday, when he fucked me from behind, I was slightly grateful he couldn’t see the chaotic emotions swirling in my eyes.
Now, he does — in full HD. I’ve always thought I showed emotions in a way no one understands, but Cole might be able to.
I don’t want him to understand.
This position, face-to-face, heart to heart, is too intimate. It’s like he’s peeling me piece by each bloody piece.
I hate that a part of me wants him to reach the core.
I hate that a part of me is grateful he’s doing this, that he’s freeing me in ways I would’ve never used to free myself.
And because I hate him, I hurt him.
I glide my hands around his back and drag my long nails down the wet skin with the intention to cause him pain.
He hisses, but instead of stopping, he picks up his pace and pounds into me with renewed ferocity as he pins me to the wall by my throat.
Then he leans down to the sensitive flesh of my breast and sucks on it before biting — hard.
My back arches off the wall and a terrifying wave spreads over me like wildfire.
“I’ll leave my mark as you leave yours, Butterfly,” he speaks through loud, erotic sucks that echo in the bathroom. “No one will see you like I do, touch you like I do, fuck you like I do.”
I come then.
The force of his pounding and the meaning behind his words bring me over the edge.
Because I know, I just know they’re real.
I can deny it all I want, but that doesn’t mean they disappear. The same as the monster under my bed.
I shouldn’t have looked. Now, I can’t unsee him or pretend he’s not there.
“Scream,” he rasps against my mouth as he slaps my arse.
I do scream. The lust-filled sound reverberates around us like a rondo in the final round of a piano concerto.
That’s when Cole empties his load inside me with a deep-throated groan.
My head drops against his chest, my fingers clinging limply to his sides and tiny tremors pulse through my legs.
For what seems like a full minute, we stand there, the water beating down on us as we’re tangled around each other.
Who knew showers could get this intense?
“See? It’s not hard to listen to orders,” he speaks against my ear, licking and nibbling on the shell.
Reality kicks back in.
Damn me and damn him. I shove him away, causing him to chuckle as he pulls out of me and releases my throat.
Unlike yesterday, the feel of his cum only lingers a little before it’s washed away by the water.
“I hate you,” I murmur.
He pulls on my hair and kisses my nose. “Sure thing, Butterfly. As long as it lets you sleep at night.”
Then he leaves. Water drips over his hair and hard body as his feet pad on the floor.
The moment the door clicks behind him, I release a muffled, frustrated scream in the silence of the bathroom.
Cole
We spend the entire early evening with Sebastian and his campaign members.
We eat a meal fit for an army that Mum prepared. Sebastian considers his team a family, too. Since they’re working hard for his campaign, they get to eat as family members.
A part of Sebastian’s campaign focuses on bringing the classes together, even if there’s a clear separation. It’s a smart way to look at it. He recognises that there’s no way to eradicate classes — at least, not right away — so he thinks the first step should be bringing them together.
Once they think they have enough in common, maybe then, the classes can be abolished. Not that his party will ever agree on that front, but he’s only planting the seed for now.
He’s a smart politician, and I do believe he’ll go far. I have no doubt in my mind he’ll become the next prime minister.
That means I’ll be the prime minister’s son while Silver is the daughter. There’s no way in fuck we’ll ever be able to have a public relationship.
It’s part of the reason why I lost it and took her at the wedding. There was so much angry energy boiling inside me and I had to smile and take pictures and accept congratulations for something I never wanted to happen.
But like Silver, I care about Mum too much to kill her chance at happiness. She was brought up in a closed-off environment by her strict father before she was shipped off to an abusive husband that she spent years recovering from the remnants of his degradation.
Since Sebastian came into her life, she doesn’t need the pills to sleep or to eat. She doesn’t walk around the house like a ghost, or kiss me like a robot who feels nothing because of antidepressants.
Mum deserves this.
But that doesn’t mean I’ll do as Silver demands and walk away from her. It doesn’t mean I’ll let her slip away from between my fingers and go to some other fucker while I watch like a pussy.
She’s currently sitting across from me around the conference table in Sebastian’s office as the head of his PR, Frederic, goes through the family part of the campaign.