It’s nothing like the expensive necklaces Mum gets for me that I only wear when I’m out with her.
I stare back at Cole to find him leaning on the piano, legs crossed at the ankles and his fingers running over the black keys without pressing them.
But his entire attention is on me. I take a moment to see him, the boy, the damnation, Helen’s son who doesn’t deserve to be.
His hair is tousled. Sometimes, I wonder if he bothers to comb it after showers. His physique has started to fill Royal Elite Junior’s uniform. Even the hollow of his neck has become muscled. His shoulders have broadened, his legs have lengthened, and in no time, he’s become way taller than me.
He’s so different from the boy who sat beside me that day at the park. The boy who saw me cry and was about to leave until I made him stay.
One thing hasn’t changed, though. His eyes.
They’re still as hard as back then. Others might find them mesmerising, but I’ve often found them a little bit haunted, a little bit mysterious, and a little bit frightening.
Cole might be the best at hiding his expressions and feelings, but he can’t hide what I see in those dark greens. They have a language all of their own, yet right now, I can’t figure out what they are saying.
My fingers shake, only a little, before I drop them from the necklace and speak in a smaller voice than I would like, “What is this for?”
“Our new beginning.”
“Our new beginning?”
“Yes. Sebastian didn’t say anything?”
Papa did mention he’d tell me something at dinner tonight, but I thought it was about his upcoming travel plans.
“What is he supposed to say?” And why does Cole know about it and I don’t?
He remains silent, almost as if he’s testing my nerves. Scratch that. He’s absolutely doing so.
Then he smiles. It’s blinding, his smile. He doesn’t do it often, but when he does, all I can do is stop and stare. “Congrats on the engagement with Aiden.”
My heart drops and it takes everything in me not to cry. He’s congratulating me? Not that I expected him to tell me not to go through with it after that text, but I thought he’d at least be upset about it.
He’s congratulating me. Seriously?
“Deflowering and an engagement all in one day,” he continues in that calm, infuriating tone. “You work fast, just like your mum.”
“Don’t you dare bring up my mum.” My voice raises. “You have no right to talk about her.”
“Why, Butterfly? Afraid you’ll turn out just like her?” He leans over so only a small breath separates us. “Here’s a reality check: with someone like Aiden, you’ll end up worse than your mother; you’ll end up like his mother. You’ll be found dead after long hours of suffering in the middle of nowhere.”
I raise my fist and punch him in the chest, my eyes stinging. “Screw you, Cole.”
I’m about to remove the necklace and give it back, but he says, “If you remove that, I’ll take it as you’re forfeiting.”
Pursing my lips, I drop my arm. Why does he know the right buttons to push? There’s nothing I hate more than losing before even starting.
“Go away,” I dismiss him. “I don’t want to see your face again.”
“That would be hard, considering the family ties and all.”
“What?”
“Mum and Sebastian are dating.”
Oh, God.
If my jaw could hit the floor, it would right about now.
My plan from a year ago worked. A part of me is thrilled that Helen and Papa have their second chance, but the other part, the one who’s staring at those soulless green eyes, makes me pause.
Cole is Helen’s son.
If this goes any further he’ll be…
No. Nope. I won’t allow my brain to voice that thought.
“Do you know what that means, Butterfly?”
I shake my head frantically, not wanting to think about it.
He places both his palms on my cheeks until his lips hover an inch away from mine and then, just like that, he brushes them against my mouth once before he claims it in a kiss.
It’s nothing like the one from one year ago. It’s not mere massaging of tongues and innocent strokes. This time, he devours me, our teeth clinking together while he aggressively kisses me.
His fingers dig into my skin as he angles my head up and plunges his tongue inside, swirling it against mine. It’s like he can’t get enough.
Ican’t get enough.
There’s a voice in my head telling me I should stop this, but I’m too drunk on his taste, on the way he grabs me and eats me alive, to listen to that voice.
As he pulls away, he bites my lower lip, making me wince. Then he whispers near my jaw, “I’ll take good care of you, baby sister.”
His words bring me out of my stupor, but I’m still too numb. I can’t even move my hands up to punch him.
“Don’t waste your time practising.” He makes a loud note by hitting several keys at the same time. “I’ll win the competition.”
Then he turns and leaves.
“I hate you!” I scream at his back and he just waves two fingers without turning around.
My breathing comes in and out in a frenzy long after he’s gone. I can’t calm down. I keep licking my swollen lips without even realising it.
I’m going to hurt him as much as he hurt me.
I’m going to ruin him.
I bring out my phone and dial Papa. He picks up after two rings. He might be busy, but never too busy for me. Besides, he knows I won’t call him unless it’s urgent.
“Is everything okay, Princess?”
“No, Papa.” I adapt my slightly spooked, slightly appalled voice that I learnt from Mum. “I just saw something and I’m not sure if I should tell.”
“This is me, Princess.” His caring but firm tone makes an appearance. “You can tell me anything.”
“But it might get someone in trouble.”
“If they put themselves into trouble, they deserve it. Law doesn’t protect the stupid.”
“It’s our nurse, Miss Goldman.”
“What about her?”
“I was passing by this morning and I heard her making strange noises. I thought she was hurt, but when I peeked in, I saw her…” I take a dramatic pause.
“You saw what?”
“I’m so embarrassed to tell, Papa.”
“You should never be embarrassed to tell the truth.”
“She had her mouth around a boy’s penis,” I blurt.
“Oh, Princess. Don’t worry. I’ll take care of this.”
“Should I tell the principal? I didn’t see the boy’s face.”
“No. I’ll be the one to talk to him. When you go to school tomorrow, that nurse will be history.”
“Thank you, Papa. I love you.”
“I love you, too, Princess. See you later. I have news for you.”
“Can’t wait.” I manage a forced smile as I hang up.
One out of the way.
She shouldn’t have touched an underage kid in the first place. That scum is a paedophile and I’m doing society a favour by using Papa’s power.
Cole thinks he can win in everything, but he doesn’t know the small ways I’ll always win against him.
My fingers run over the necklace.
If he wants a war, then war is what he’ll get.
Cole
Age sixteen
Is there a place in literature or psychology books that states when you should realise you’re not…normal?
I’ve had my suspicions since that night when I stopped crying once and for all, but lately, I’ve been noticing the abnormality more than usual. I’ve been reading books about deviant behaviour and thoughts. The thing is, those theories don’t really apply to me.
I’ve never looked at a kitten or a puppy and decided I wanted to hurt it or felt the urge to. If anything, I think people who have such thoughts are cowards. They want to do greater damage, but they latch onto creatures way weaker than themselves who can’t do anything to stop them. Those people are pathetic, and I’ll never belong in the same bracket as them.
That leaves me with little to no choices as to where I should be put. Do I have anti-social behaviour? Do I want to hurt people?
The answer to the latter is no. I don’t care about people enough to want to hurt them.
Besides, I love my mum. In my own way. She’s the reason I still believe there could be something else for me.
Chaos is still one of my secret tendencies, though.
Whenever I find the opportunity to bring it back to the world, I do. Since we play football, I usually get that chance by instigating a small fight here, a rivalry there. It brings flavour to the other players’ boring lives, so they should thank me for it.