On the outside, I can’t move. I can’t call for help. I can only shriek in the confinements of my soul.
It’s like I’m yelling into the void with no one to hear me. I’m being ripped apart by the black hands and no one can save me.
I’ve started drinking all sorts of energy drinks, coffee, and any caffeinated stuff to stop myself from closing my eyes at night.
Sleep scares the shit out of me.
Another drink slides in front of me. I stare at the sparkling blue and realize I finished my current one.
Landon winks at me.
I smile but with no humor whatsoever as I snatch it.
Caffeine equals no sleep. Even if it’s unhealthy.
“Now that you’ve cooled down,” he whispers near my ear. “How about we talk business?”
“Business?”
“Annika takes you to the Heathens’ mansion for parties, no?”
“Rarely.”
“Rarely is an entry.”
I narrow my eyes. “Why are you asking?”
“I thought maybe you could finish what you started and get me a layout of the mansion.”
“Are you serious?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
“You must be out of your mind if you think I’ll help you again after you instigated arson.”
“Shh. They think it was the Serpents’ doing. They even burned their warehouse and beat them to a pulp for revenge. I finished the popcorn so fast while watching that particular show.”
A sadistic glint shines in his eyes. He’s enjoying this. Too much. It’s almost a part of who he is now, and nothing will stop him from carrying out his plans.
People like Lan don’t have a motive, a goal, or an endgame. They just get off on causing anarchy.
“I’m not going to help you with your plans,” I say with a calm I don’t feel. “Not now, not ever.”
Then I stand up, providing a flimsy excuse about needing the bathroom.
Instead, I go outside for fresh air, thankful for the slow disappearance of all the noise.
Some drunk uni kids stumble out, acting all rowdy and reeking of alcohol.
I walk in the opposite direction and exhale when I reach the car park.
My hair stands on end and I get that distinctive feeling of being watched and cryptic eyes following my every move.
Could it be him?
I look around, only to be greeted with a couple getting into their car and a guy talking on the phone at the far end.
Of course it’s nothing.
Why would I think he’s watching me when he hasn’t done it in weeks?
My chest deflates as I stand by my car’s door and pull out my phone to send a text in the girls’ group chat.
Cecily: I’m going home.
Ava:No, come back, Cecy. It’s no fun without you.
I appreciate her saying that, even though she thinks I’m too responsible and stiff to actually live.
But none of them know that I’ve already done something. The night I drove to that cottage and gave Jeremy the green light to ravage me was the day I felt the most alive in my whole life.
None of my friends will find out about it, though, because they might look at me as if I were a freak.
Glyndon: What she said.
Ava: Remi said of course you’re leaving first, because you’re a nerdy prude and can’t handle fun times.
Cecily: Remi’s opinion doesn’t matter.
Ava:OMG!! You’re letting him get away with it? I only said that so you’d come back and put him in his place.
I’d rather preserve that energy to read my mangas all night long, thank you very much.
Cecily: Night. Don’t get too drunk. I mean it.
I’m about to tell Glyn to keep an eye on her, but I get a glimpse of a shadow in the car’s window.
It’s only for a moment in time.
A fraction of a second is all it takes for me to get caught in dark eyes.
The same eyes that I can’t forget about, despite trying to. Despite convincing myself that he’s nothing more than a devil and I should be thankful he’s no longer interested in me.
My mouth opens, but he slams a hand over it. A large, masculine hand that steals my breath.
Or maybe that’s not the entire reason behind my inability to breathe or the shaking in my limbs.
“Shh. Not a sound.”
I gulp and that makes me taste him. The hint of cologne, wood, and leather mixed with his natural scent.
Something that I couldn’t forget even if I tried.
“You’re coming with me.”
My body quivers for an entirely different reason as I spin around and shove at his chest.
I put all my strength behind the hit, too, completely unconcerned about the fact that he could subdue me in no time. Or that I’m no match for him physically.
“I’m going nowhere with you.” I pant. “We’re already over.”
And he ignored me.
He ghosted me.
He gave me the best experience of my life, then completely erased me.
He brought me out of my invisible bubble just to decimate me.
And that hurt.
I didn’t realize how much it hurt until I stared at his soulless eyes a moment ago. Now that I’m looking at him, at his sharp features and unaffected expression, I want to sink my nails into his leather jacket where his heart is and rip it out, maybe see if there is one.
“Over?” He takes a step forward, trapping me against my car as a twitch lifts his lips. “We’re just getting started, Cecily.”
JEREMY
Iwatched Cecily all night long.
I’ve been following close behind since she left the shelter and headed back to the flat, wearing tight jeans and a baggy sweater. Earbuds in her ears. Gaze lost in the horizon.
I remained on my bike behind the bushes and watched her window, waiting for her figure to appear, and it did, once, wrapped in nothing but a towel. Her wet silver hair cascaded to below her shoulders and she stood by the window.
For a moment, I thought she saw me, that no matter how strategically I hide, Cecily will always see me.
But that belief only lasted until I realized she was in fact caught in a trance. She stood there and looked, but no feelings could be detected.
She was there physically, but not mentally.
That state lasted for exactly fifteen minutes. Fifteen minutes of remaining as still as a soulless statue.
Fifteen minutes of…nothingness.
My molars grinded together and I nearly crushed my helmet between my fingers from how much I squeezed it. I contemplated jumping through her window and shaking the fuck out of her.
But then Ava came in, her face and movements full of giddy excitement. Cecily snapped out of it soon after, crossed her arms over her chest and listened as her friend chattered on, grabbed her shoulders, and pushed her in the direction of the closet.
Twenty minutes later, they were in a downtown pub. With their guy friends. Namely, that motherfucker Landon.
I was around the corner when they whispered to each other, when he grinned at her and she smiled at him. When he offered her a drink and she took it sheepishly.
When she ignored everyone else and talked to him.
When he kept nudging her shoulder with his, demanding her attention and eventually getting it.
I was so close to walking up there and slicing his throat then watch as it formed a pool around his body.
Before I could act on those destructive thoughts, she slipped out of the group, looking miserable as fuck, expression downward and shoulders hunched.
I slipped behind her the moment she fetched her phone and started texting her friends.
She didn’t even realize I was there until she saw my reflection in the glass.
I’ve thought of a million methods of handling Cecily Knight once I had her beneath my claws again. I could play with her until she breaks.
Hold her hostage until she squirms.
My favorite is to let her run just so I can catch her.
But now that she’s standing in front of me so close that I can breathe the water lilies off her skin and count the freckles dusting her cheeks, none of those options seem like enough.
And when the green of her eyes darkens? Fuck me. I want to do bad things to this girl.
Yes, I know she’s angry, but my cock can’t take a hint to save his life.
Cecily never dresses up for nights out. She has the same copy-paste style of jeans, a T-shirt, and comfy-looking tennis shoes. But tonight, the shirt is a bit tighter, molding against the curve of her round breasts and her defined waist.
The writing on it is in big, bold letters. Party person. Not.
Ever since she whirled around, I’ve been clenching my fist at my side, barely stopping my beast from taking action. He’s aroused by the expression on her face.
The stiffness of her muscles.
The sharpness of her demeanor.
Defiance radiates off her in waves. She’s glaring at me, but something else lurks behind the apparent emotion.
Something like…disdain. Pain.
“I’m not starting anything with you.” Her body shakes with the guttural quality of her voice.
She’s forcing something a lot deeper than words.
I lean against the car behind me, letting my body fall into a neutral stance by crossing my legs at the ankles. Either that or I’ll drag her with me by my hand around her throat.
A throat that’s no longer red and purple with the evidence of my teeth. It’s pale, translucent, crowded with veins and arteries peeking through the skin. Cecily watches my every move, that delicate throat working up and down with a swallow.
Note to self: mark it again.