We drove to the Hamptons afterward, even if Aria had given us the option to join them in the morning. I wanted to be under the same roof as Isa in the night. When we arrived at the mansion after midnight, the windows were dark. We headed straight for our bedroom as not to disturb anyone and went for another round of fucking, this time far less gentle, in our bed. Afterward we lay in each other’s arms, staring into each other’s eyes.
“Maybe we should relieve Aria and Luca,” I whispered. It was strange not to have the baby monitor at my side to listen to every sound Isa made.
Matteo chuckled. “Missing our little poo machine?”
I shrugged. “I do. It’s the first time we left her with someone else for so many hours.”
Matteo stroked my hair. “She’s fine. Luca and Aria are taking care of her.”
“We’re lucky,” I said quietly. “Without them, we wouldn’t be here today.”
“Yeah, they are our better halves,” Matteo joked.
“They are.” I traced Matteo’s tattoo. “Sometimes I worry about Isa.”
Matteo’s eyes became sharp. “Why? You know I’ll protect her.”
“I don’t mean an outside attack. I worry about her growing up in the Famiglia with all its old-fashioned rules. The outside world changes but our world remains mostly the same. Girls still remain virgins until they marry. Even if we don’t teach her those values, she’ll be surrounded by them.”
Matteo shook his head. “I really don’t want to think about our innocent little daughter ever having sex. I can see how crazy Luca gets when anyone comments on Marcella being ten and how it could be time to look for a good match for her.”
“As if anyone could ever be good enough for Marci in Luca’s eyes. I feel pity for the poor idiot who’ll have to marry her.”
Matteo grinned like a shark. “Luca and I will have a long conversation with him.”
“You two are impossible,” I muttered. “But it isn’t only that. What about arranged marriages, bloody sheets, cutting the bride out of her dress and all that?”
“How about we try to survive the first ten years before we worry about teenage years, and marriage and bloody sheets?”
I huffed. Matteo pulled me closer and kissed me. “Not all arranged marriages are bad.”
“Luca and Aria are the exception.”
“I was talking about us,” Matteo said.
I opened my eyes in fake shock. He growled and rolled on top of me. “Everyone always said I needed to teach you manners, where did I go wrong?”
He nuzzled my neck in a distracting way.
“Wrong woman,” I whispered then sucked in a breath when he licked a particularly sensitive spot at my throat.
“Just the woman I need,” he growled, but his wandering hands distracted me from a reply.
We fell asleep in each other’s arms but sometime during the night I woke and couldn’t fall back asleep. I carefully untangled myself from Matteo and tiptoed out the door and toward the nursery. The mansion was big enough so that every child had their own room and every baby their own nursery.
I hoped Isabella was there and not in Aria’s and Luca’s bedroom with them. I opened the door and froze at the sight before me. The small night light cast a yellowish glow in the room. Luca was asleep in the armchair and Aria was curled up on top of him. Isabella was fast asleep in her crib but I assumed she had kept them awake most of the night if they’d decided to sleep in the nursery. She’d been a bit fussy these last few days but I’d hoped she’d settle down tonight.
I took a step inside and Luca’s eyes shot open, tension radiating through his body, his arm coming protectively around my sleeping sister. Then his eyes settled on me and he relaxed. He yawned and glanced at the clock. It was four a.m.
He rose with Aria in his arms, cradling her to his chest and came slowly toward me.
I mouthed, “Thank you.”
Luca nodded. “Will Matteo be more tolerable tomorrow?” he asked in a low voice.
I rolled my eyes at him but couldn’t stop a smile from forming.
Luca shook his head and muttered something I didn’t catch before he walked off with Aria’s sleeping form.
I watched them a moment longer before I moved silently toward the crib. Isabella looked so peaceful and cute, I had to stop myself from picking her up and cuddling her. I didn’t want to wake her. I dragged the chair a bit closer and sank down with my chin on the rail so I could watch my baby. I reached out for her and stroked her cheek then her reddish-brown hair. It was a bit lighter than Matteo’s but darker than mine. Her eye color was still difficult to determine, a mix of blue and brown, but she had my freckles. They graced her cheeks and nose adorably.
“I knew I’d find you here,” Matteo murmured as he came in, his sweatpants hanging low on his hips. Those abs still got me every time. He leaned over me, his chin lightly resting atop my head.
“I still can’t believe she’s ours. She looks so innocent and peaceful.”
“She can scream like a little fury,” I said with a small laugh. “She’ll drive us crazy soon enough.”
“Ohh, I have no doubt about that.”
We watched her a little while longer before we returned to our bedroom with the baby monitor and fell asleep almost instantly.
The next morning, Aria and Luca already sat at the breakfast table when we dragged our asses down. We joined them, Isa wedged on my hip. She was clingy this morning, maybe because of our separation last night or maybe because she was caught up in some kind of development phase. I didn’t try to let mom guilt overwhelm me. If I wanted to stay sane and protect my marriage, Matteo and I needed the occasional day or evening off.
After some fussing, I finally managed to get Isa to recline into her baby seat and sank down on the chair beside her.
Cradling her still flat pregnant belly, Aria had an expression of utmost baby bliss on her face as she watched my daughter. I stifled a laugh. My sister was the born mother. No wonder she couldn’t understand that Matteo and I didn’t want more of these little poop machines. She gave me a sheepish smile when she noticed my attention. I winked at her.
“Do you think Lily and Romero will join us tonight? We haven’t had dinner together since we both gave birth,” I said.
Aria gave a delicate shrug. Matteo of course was less restrained. “Even if they come over, I doubt Liliana can tear herself away from admiring the little poop machine.”
“They have two, I doubt Sara is out of diapers yet,” Luca commented.
Aria sent both men reprimanding looks. “Lily is a very caring mother.”
Matteo’s cough sounded remarkably like a cluck.
“What does that make me, a cuckoo?” I joked. Isa laughed as if she could understand what was going on. For a second, I felt horrible because I had almost become the cuckoo to drop her off with Aria. She would have had the perfect life with my sister, but I couldn’t imagine giving her away anymore.
Aria looked flustered. “Of course not. I just don’t want us to make Lily feel bad for being a bit over caring with Flavio. Every mother handles the newborn phase differently.”
“All right, Dalai-L’Aria,” Matteo said with a wink.
She pointed her fork at him. “Remember you’ll need to be on my good side if you and Gianna want more couple time.”
“As if you could ever say no to them, if they ask you for a favor,” Luca muttered.
I stifled a laugh at the caught look Aria gave him.
Lily and Romero actually joined us in the Hamptons with their kids that afternoon, and even had an almost adult-only dinner (if you didn’t count Marci and Amo) with us. The rest of the kids were already asleep. It almost felt like old times, apart from Marci’s pouty-face because Luca had told her to turn her music down in less than favorable words for the band members. He’d compared their songs to castrated cats. Amo of course couldn’t shut up about castrated cats since then, making mew sounds all the time to provoke Marci.
Lily was a bit jumpy whenever Flavio made the slightest sound or even when the baby monitor only let out a crackle but apart from that, we had a pleasant dinner. We even chatted about more than diapers and spew incidents. I grinned at Matteo. Old Gianna and new Mom-Gianna could co-exist peacefully.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Gianna
We fell into a good routine and eventually I really thought I’d mastered motherhood while also keeping up my classes in the gym. Of course, Aria’s warning that especially the first year could be a constant up and down proved right.
At five months, Isa was teething and absolutely intolerable most days. I was torn between worry and pity over her red cheeks. Yet, my worst enemy was exhaustion.
Matteo and I decided to spend a few days in the Hamptons to come down. The ocean air usually calmed Isa but even that was barely working. Aria and Luca had stayed in New York because Aria had a pregnancy checkup and Amo some kind of neck-breaking dirt race. I still wasn’t sure how Amo and Luca had convinced Aria to let him choose this insane hobby. Probably Luca’s argument that he needed to harden the boy for the mob had worked its magic.
It was late in the evening while Matteo was out to grab us food at our favorite place when Isa had a particularly bad crying episode.
Eventually I began to cry as well, overwhelmed and doubting myself and my decision to become a mother. Aria would have been the better choice.
I was rocking Isa, trying to calm her down when heavy steps rang out. I let out a surprised cry when Luca suddenly appeared in the doorway to the nursery.
I was only in Matteo’s shirt and I wasn’t even sure if I was wearing underwear.
“Aria decided to spend a few days here,” he said carefully.
“What about that race?” I said, trying to pretend I wasn’t a crying mess.
“It was in the afternoon. We drove here right after.”
“I guess it’s Aria’s sixth sense,” I said with a forced laugh. “She could feel I didn’t have my shit together and came to the rescue.”
Luca nodded, still watching me. “She’s downstairs, trying to settle an argument between Amo and Marcella.”
Isa let out a particularly loud wail, her cute face becoming a grimace.
Luca approached me as if I were a spooked horse. “Let me hold her for a bit.” In the past, I would have chewed his ear off for the commanding tone but I was glad for his presence. He gently took Isa from me.
“I don’t even remember if I put on panties,” I said miserably.
Luca regarded me. “Don’t worry, I won’t lift that shirt to find out. I saw you down there once, that’ll last for a lifetime.”
I snorted, and a knot loosened hearing his familiar jibe. “Bastard, I was squeezing a baby out of me. I don’t always look like that down there.”
Luca smirked. “If you say so. Still, no thanks.”
I lightly punched the arm that wasn’t holding Isabella. “Careful. I’m not too tired to kick balls.”
“Good,” Luca said, then he rocked Isabella again. When he looked back up his expression was stern. “Go to bed. Get some sleep.”
My eyes darted to Isa. “But… I should rock her. I should take care of her. And Matteo will be back with takeout any moment.” I wasn’t even hungry. I should have been because I hadn’t eaten since breakfast but my body only craved sleep.
“And you do care for her. Truth be told, I never expected you to be a good mom but you proved me wrong,” Luca said. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t get help if you need it. Now go to bed before I drag you there. You can eat cold pizza later.”
“I really want to hug you right now,” I admitted.
“Wait a few seconds, it’ll pass,” Luca said dryly, but his eyes had softened slightly, which was a rare enough sight that it made me emotional.
Luca narrowed his eyes. “Bed. Now.”
I rolled my eyes. “Bastard.”
“Bitch.”
I gave him a small smile, then turned and walked back to our bedroom. The moment my head hit the pillow, I passed out.
Matteo
Luca’s car was parked in front of the mansion when I pulled up. When I checked my phone, I saw his message telling me they’d join us. Grabbing our takeout order had taken longer than anticipated, mainly because I was so sleep deprived that I’d briefly dozed off at the steering wheel and decided to pull over for a minute. That had turned into a power nap of almost forty-five minutes.
Now the car smelled of pizza, which was probably cold by now, and my neck was stiff from the awkward position I’d slept in. I was lucky Tartarus or the Bratva hadn’t chosen my moment of weakness for an attack.
I got out of the car, glad for the cooler evening breeze that cleared my head slightly. Grabbing our takeout, I headed into the house. Neither Gianna nor Luca or his family were downstairs. The low murmur of voices came from upstairs. I set the food down on the dining table before I headed upstairs to find Gianna. All doors were closed so I headed straight for our bedroom. Gianna was curled up on top of the covers in my T-shirt, her perky ass naked and turned my way. Usually the sight would have given me all kinds of naughty ideas, but the last few days of teething and colic had sucked the energy out of me.
Fuck.
Isa wasn’t beside Gianna nor in the crib next to our bed. I turned on my heel and stalked toward Luca’s and Aria’s bedroom, knocking. After a moment, Luca opened the door, already only in boxers. “Is Isa here?”
“Yes,” Aria called from the bathroom before she emerged with a squirming Isa in her arms.
“I can take her,” I said.
Luca shook his head. “You look like shit. You and especially Gianna need a good night’s sleep. With Isa in your room that’s not going to happen. She’s fussy.”
Aria stopped beside Luca. Isa’s cheeks were red as she sucked on a teething ring. I ran a hand through my hair. “Who could have guessed that such a small thing could mean so much trouble?” I leaned down and pressed a kiss to Isa’s forehead.
“It doesn’t get better once they double and triple in size,” Luca muttered.
“You’re crazy for wanting this again,” I said.
Aria smiled. “Go to sleep.”
I nodded and dragged my exhausted ass back to our bedroom. For less than a second, I considered lifting Gianna and tugging her in, then I just let myself drop down on the covers beside her and zoned out.
* * *