I hover over his lips, feeling for them as his warm breath makes me want to wrap myself up inside of him. “I know,” I whisper again. “I ruined it, didn’t I?”
We’re victims of circumstance. At least I can feel confident that I would’ve liked him no matter what. If he were any other guy who came into my bar, sat down, and talked to me, I would’ve wanted him. He can be gruff, and he’s way out of practice dealing with people, but I’m happy around him, and I like that the only thing he seems to need from me is my presence. He’s happier with me here.
“You need to not fight me, okay?” I tell him. “I’ll go to my sister’s tomorrow, and I’ll be more than fine. You don’t have to worry about me. I never should’ve stayed—”
Suddenly, though, he grabs the backs of my thighs and lifts me up, forcing my legs to wrap around him. Planting me against the wall, he peers up at me and shakes his head. “You’re not going anywhere.”
And then he darts in, capturing the underside of my chin in his mouth. I gasp, my head falling back and my lids closing, as he bites and kisses, sending tingles down my arms.
I grip his shoulders and give in, squirming against him and craving the friction of him between my legs.
One of his arms holds me up while the other trails to my bra strap, pulling it down, so he can kiss the skin on my shoulder.
I pant, desperate. “Take it off. Please.”
His hand goes to my back, but instead of unhooking me, he yanks at the strap and pulls it down. I’m only bare for a moment, though, before we both hear a door slam inside the house and startle.
“Dad?” Cole calls. “You up?”
“Shit,” Pike hisses under his breath.
“Oh, God.” I squirm out of his hold, and he releases me. I dive down, gathering up my shirt and shoes again, holding them up to cover myself. I see the kitchen light pop on through the back door, and I swing around the side of the house, hiding just out of sight.
My heart is pounding in my ears, and I can’t swallow. I peer around the corner at Pike, and he’s looking around like he’s not sure what to do, but he finally grabs the hose, still running water, and continues washing off his already clean arms and hands.
“Yeah, out here!” he calls, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down.
I hear the screen door creak open, and I slink back, making sure I’m out of sight.
“Hey, what are you doing?” I hear Cole ask.
I hurriedly re-hook my bra and pull on my damp T-shirt again.
“Just cleaning off,” Pike answers. “The river nearly flooded the harbor today. I tried to call you.”
“Yeah, sorry.”
There’s a moment of silence, and all I can hear is the running water spilling onto the now-flooded grass.
“Where’s Jordan?” Cole says.
“I don’t know…inside?”
My eyes fall and guilt hits me like a stab. He’d had to lie to him.
I mean, of course he would. I would’ve, as well. But the reality sinks in that I can leave Cole and walk away and life will go on. Pike can’t do that. That’s his son.
“You staying?” Pike asks him.
“Just picking up some stuff,” Cole explains, sounding solemn. “I don’t think she’ll want me around for a while yet. Thanks for letting her stay here.”
Pike’s voice is barely above a whisper. “It’s not a problem.”
There’s more silence, and then I hear the water shut off and some shuffling.
“She really took care of me when …” Cole trails off and then continues, “when I couldn’t stand to have anyone else around. I never wanted to hurt her.”
Needles prick my throat. Everything is so messed up, because I don’t know how angry I’m allowed to be.
He did it right under my nose. For weeks.
But in my heart, I wasn’t faithful to him, either.
Somewhere down deep, we always knew this was finite.
“You can come home,” his father says quietly, almost pleading.
But Cole doesn’t respond, and I wish I could see his face. Is he looking at his father? He can’t meet peoples’ eyes when he’s upset or sad.
“What are you doing?” Pike asks him, so much sadness in his voice. “What are you doing with yourself, huh?”
I hear a sigh and then Cole says, “I’ll talk to her. Eventually.”
And then the screen door falls shut, flapping against the frame, and I slowly peek around the corner, seeing Pike standing alone in the spot where I left him.
His brow is etched in pain, and he’s staring at the ground. His head turns slightly toward me, though.
“He doesn’t treat you right, and he should,” Pike says, his face ridden with guilt. “But this can’t happen, Jordan.”
I press my teeth together, tears lodged in the back of my throat.
I know.
I know.
Chapter 16
Pike
I can feel her. Her warm legs snaking through and over mine between the sheets, and she’s hot and wet between her legs as she grinds on me. I grab her by the hips and flip us over, yanking down her panties and diving down, taking her in my mouth.
God, her moans are so sweet, and I don’t want to ever leave this bed. I want to do nothing but feel her and taste her and smell her, make her smile and sweat and come. She’s mine.
But suddenly, my eyes pop open, blinking into the early morning’s dim light.
I’m alone, and I breathe in through my nose, chasing her smell in the dream.
I close my eyes. “Jesus,” I pant, licking my dry lips.
I fist my hands, still feeling her ass in my palms, and I need her. I need the same soft body I had in my arms last night so badly my jaw aches from clenching it.
Rubbing the sweat off my neck, I peer down and see my dick tenting the sheet.
Fuck.
I need to get laid. That’s all there is to it. Jordan isn’t special.
She’s not.
She’s a hot, young woman living in my house and constantly in my face, walking around in her short shorts with her long legs, perky ass, and lips that taste like a fucking peach. It’s like putting a steak in front of a starving pit bull and saying “don’t touch.”
I groan as my dick swells with blood, growing even harder.
God, if I called her in here right now, would she come? I’m tempted to take back what I said last night, I want back what I had in my hands that much.
But no.
I’m already aching with guilt, and losing control and going further with her would do a world of hurt. Last night was simply the result of not being fed in too long. Nothing more.
Christ, she’s a kid. If she were two years younger, I could go to prison for what I almost did to her last night.
I need to get this out of my system.
Throwing off the sheet, I get out of bed and pull on some boxer briefs and jeans. After throwing some cold water on my face, brushing my teeth, and running some gel through my hair, my dick has calmed down enough to leave my room. I pull on a T-shirt and the rest of my stuff that I’ll need for work and walk out of the room.
If Cole hadn’t come home when he did…
I jog down the stairs, pushing it out of my head. I just hope she doesn’t think she needs to leave on account of this. It probably would be for the best, but I don’t want to be another person she can’t count on.
In the kitchen, I pour myself a cup of coffee and open the fridge, looking for the milk.
I pinch my brows together, shifting cartons around and only finding almond milk. I take it out and wrinkle my nose, studying it. Almonds produce milk?
Jordan. I roll my eyes and uncap it, sniffing it. “Hmm…” It doesn’t smell bad.
I shrug and pour it in the coffee.
Picking up the mug, I slip my other hand into my pocket and lean against the counter, blowing on the coffee.
I hear Jordan’s footfalls on the stairs, and my stomach twists as I blink long and hard to brace myself.
She breezes into the kitchen, lifting her eyes and meeting mine long enough to give me a quick, curt half-smile before trailing around the table and pulling her book bag off a chair.
She seems in a hurry.
I force the words out. The sooner we deal with it, the sooner we can get back to normal. “I’m sorry about last night,” I tell her. “It was my fault, and it shouldn’t have happened. Okay?”
Her hands slow, and I see her eyes shift as she digs in her pack, but she doesn’t look at me.
She pulls the zipper closed and straightens, heading toward me and pulling open the fridge.
“I gotta go,” she says.
I watch her warily. She doesn’t seem mad. She just seems nervous. Maybe she was waiting for me to take the lead to see how to handle this.
Or perhaps she wants to act like it didn’t happen at all. Maybe she regrets it.
Do I regret it?
Yeah. Yeah, of course I do.
But I enjoyed it, too. The need to take her up to my bed and savor every second and every inch of her was like looking forward to heaven last night. I wanted it. I couldn’t wait.
And I wouldn’t have stopped. My muscles hurt just thinking about what I was going to put my body through to enjoy every moment with her.
But even without Cole, she’s still half my age. Nothing about this is right.
“You’re a beautiful girl, Jordan,” I say in nearly a whisper, “but you are just a girl.”
She pauses at the fridge next to me, and I see her swallow. She’s so pretty. Hair clean and flowing, make-up subtle with just a hint of pink on her lips…
“My head wasn’t straight,” I explain. “We’re both lonely, and I’ve loved having you here so much the boundaries got blurred. It won’t happen again.”
She nods, and her gaze drops. I wish I knew what she was thinking. It’s not like her to be so quiet. Does she hate me?
“It’s okay,” she says gently.
But I shake my head. “It’s not. I don’t expect that from you. I want you to know that.”
God knows she gets enough of that shit at work.